Sunday, May 10, 2020

How to forgive your parents

Can you forgive your parents? Is forgiving your parents difficult?
When Jane was a child, her parents got divorced. Her father hasn’t been in her life at all. He was not there for her when she needed his love, his compassion, his care, and his support. He has never called to see how she is doing and never asked how she is living.

Jane often wondered to herself why her father doesn’t call her, doesn’t ask about her, and doesn’t come to see her. She wondered why she is not part of his life.
She used to look at her friend’s parents and see how happy they are. Her friends seemed to have the perfect family filled with love, compassion and care. She often wondered “Why my family doesn’t have close ties?”

After she finished high school, her father suddenly appeared in her life. He started to ask her to forgive him. Since she had a grudge on him, she didn’t even want to talk to him or listen to him.
Does this story sound familiar? Do you have a grudge against your parents?
You have to learn to forgive your parents and realize that they have done everything they could at that time to give you the best life possible. Remember, we all make mistakes.

Why you should forgive your parents?
1. Forgiving your parents helps bring you closer to them.
2. Forgiving your parents purifies your heart and releases the negative energy.
3. Forgiving your parents gives you the chance to heal and focus on the present.

How to forgive your parents?
1. To forgive your parents, you need to understand the causes of what they did. For example, Jennifer in the example above should ask her father why he never cared for her and wasn’t part of her life when she grew up. Talking to your parents about the causes is the first step you need to do to forgive your parents as it helps to give you closure.

2. You have to realize that the past can’t be changed. Your parents made a mistake and it took them some time to realize their mistake. Know that we all make mistakes and want others to forgive us from time to time.
Your parents are humans and they don’t know everything. They did what they thought is the best decision at the time. By putting yourself in your parent’s position, you will, you will learn to accept the past and focus more on the present time.

3. Understand that you parents will always love you despite everything negative that has happened. You are part of them. Most parents love their children even if they don’t show it. When you understand that parents love their children, you will be more likely to forgive your parents.

4. Increase your self confidence. Research shows that people who are confident, who have high self esteem, and who are strong are more likely to forgive others. Always remember what Mahatma Gandhi said about forgiveness and being strong, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”

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