During difficult situations and circumstances that are insurmountable, lying to ourselves may become a coping mechanism to psychologically heal inner wounds. It gives a false sense of reality and becomes comfortable as it supports living in a state of denial to prevent facing difficulty and hurtful situations. Cognitive Dissonance, is a psychological term associated with having mental anguish due to contradictory beliefs, ideas, and or values. Due to conflicting perceptions, people may tend to ignore issues to deceive others or themselves by pretending a problem doesn't exist. Our childhood, beliefs, societal norms, personality, and religious factors can influence our behavior in becoming susceptible to falling victim to cognitive dissonance. If you are an individual whose childhood experiences were seeing your parents in an unhealthy relationship or marriage due to strong religious or societal beliefs, then you would be more vulnerable to encountering similar experiences as an adult. You may even take on the same strategies you watched your parents take in resolving domestic matters. Children learn and develop perceptions based on observational learning. Telling a child do not do this or that may be somewhat ineffective. This is because what you observe, and experience is more likely to stick with you unconsciously and consciously. So you end up finding yourself in very similar situations that mirrors what you observed from your parents once you are an adult. As the saying goes, girls marry someone like their father and boys will marry someone like their mother but not always. An article, How Violence Against a Mother Shapes Children as They Grow by Allison Cunningham & Linda Baker (London Family Court Clinic, Inc.) highlights various case studies, surveys, and myths of effects toxic marriages and relationships have on children. One myth highlighted was children will recognize their mother as the victim in cases of domestic violence if this was the reality. However, this was a misconception and was identified as a myth. The reality is children can blame the mother as much or more than they blame fathers as young children do not recognize power imbalance. Especially, when fathers play the victim role. Women who watched their mother be abused while growing up are more likely to be vulnerable to abusive relationships. Keep in mind that abuse comes in many forms such as mental, emotional, and physical.
Accepting toxicity comes easy although consciously aware that the situation doesn't serve any good. Hence, cognitive dissonance may come into play. Rigorous religious structures that are widely interpreted differently based on childhood experiences can play a part in not living life to the fullest. In other words, you become stagnated in knowing yourself due to fear of breaking away from what you have known life always to be. Yes, Mama and Papa did things this way, but you have ultimate freedom and control to create your own traditions and best life. Sometimes what is not said is of more significance then what is unspoken. Preachers will often reference remaining in a marriage without mentioning situations that are unhealthy to do so. This becomes an imbalance and alters perceptions and prevents you from living life to the fullest.
You may become so focused on doing well on the job and pleasing others that it becomes easy to lose sight of your full potential and what is healthy for you. You constantly over perform or try to sell your creative ideas only to find someone claims rights to it and gets the credit. In these types of situations don't deceive yourself. Know who you are and have confidence in your abilities. You are in a temporary situation. Being true to yourself is knowing that your ideas are too good to share with those you know do not have your best interest at heart. Instead find another trusted partner who will support your business decisions. It's time to identify where you can be free from restrictions to reach your fullest potential. While its wise not to quit a job without having another one just knowing that there is light at the end of a tunnel can keep you motivated.
I believe that God is loving and forgiving. Never would God permit his children to live in constant toxicity based on any scripture or rigid man-made beliefs. There is always a clarifying scripture, ram in the bush if you will that provides a way of relief. The biblical scripture, states Mathew 11:30, "For my yoke is easy and my burden is light". Here, God is telling us that we can find rest and safety from life woes through faith in his word. Too much toxicity and negativity are not in the alignment with the universal source which is the strongest force, love. What makes us feel and become fulfilled? What causes us to continue our spiritual path to complete our purpose? This is the road we must stay on to knowing ourselves. Just like a finger print your individual life map can never be replicated. Therefore, if someone tells you what your purpose is heed and be cautious! Even God is gentlemen enough to allow us to discover our purpose on our own. Be confident that you have an inner knowing of who you are. Stay connected to how situations and circumstances make you feel as clues. Life has a way of pointing us in the direction we are to take. Know thyself and remember, this is the life you create
Cognitive Dissonance, is associated with having mental anguish due to contradictory beliefs, ideas, and or values. These conflicting perceptions, deceive others as problems are perceived as if they do not exist.
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Jill_N_Young/2641462
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10079428
No comments:
Post a Comment